They ask, "What do you do?"
And you say, "I'm a writer."
And they say, "Yeah, but what do you do?"
James Baldwin goes on to tell the story of an artist "who cannot for some mysterious reason settle for the security and safety of a simple, ordinary life despite trying."
For much of my life I didn't worry about what I was doing. I traveled the world. I lived all over the US. I backpacked around the southern hemisphere. I took trains and buses and combis to mountaintops and seasides and music festivals.
A moment came when I thought I should "be something" and started school to become an elementary teacher.
Another moment came and I became a licensed esthetician.
Another came and I was running nonprofits.
Another and I was running a business.
Another and I was in art school in my 40's.
Around this time is when Baldwin's words reverberated through me.
Yeah, but what do you do? [She] cannot for some mysterious reason settle for the security and safety of a simple, ordinary life despite trying.
Baldwin illustrates how the artist has been hurt in some way...
"What is crucial here....[what hurt me is not what's important]...what is important...is that [I/we/he/you] must find some way of using our pain to connect with everyone else alive...we must use it to connect with other people's pain in order to be released from our own, and then hopefully it can work the other way around."
"Most people live in almost total darkness...
the artist is responsible for those people, to lighten their darkness..."
I was in tears.
This is where the retreat I'm hosting in January came from.
I am an emerging visual artist, but more than that, I've always been an artist. One who creates something out of nothing. One who has designed beautiful experiences since 2004 for people to have rich and meaningful experiences.
My art has always been gathering people.
I didn't call it art, but I see it now. Weddings. Galas. Wine events. Birthday parties.
Manhattan. Wine Country, California. Rural New Mexico. Mansions.
It has always flowed naturally for me to invent intimate, beautiful and deeply meaningful experiences for people.
The retreat I'm hosting in January is no different. But, what is different it that it's through the lens of recognition that I am an artist and that so are you.
We are all artists. Some painters. Some sculptors. Some musicians. Some experience designers. Some strategists. Some entrepreneurs. Some....
I will die on this hill.
It's took me over 40 years to realize the tension between my resistance of the ordinary and the embrace of utterly fluid joy is in fact the place where my art lives.
You may not know what your art is, but I guarantee it lives in that tension.
I will be gathering January 10, 11, 12 and 13 with a small group of people in New Mexico for my next retreat focused on rest and creativity as tools for inspiration, problem-solving and personal expansion.
Important: You don't need to identify as an artist or even emerging artist. You don't need to have a creative practice, project or idea in mind. You can simply arrive and discover or rekindle your creativity.
Here's a look at the emerging schedule:
January 10, 2026
- Arrive by plane, train or car in Albuquerque
- Welcome to the retreat house between 3-4pm
- Greeted with a warm fireplace, music, chef-prepared snacks and bubbly (both a and na)
- Gather for a gentle welcome ceremony and intention-setting
- Elegant off-site dinner
- Return for a restful night of sleep
January 11, 2025
- Coffee, tea and warm pastries (g and gf) waiting for you as you
- Breakfast served at 8:30
- Gather at 9:30 to feel into intentions, and what you want to do
- Optional off-site silent hike in the mountains
- Nearby walking trails, nooks and spaces at the retreat house to sink into should you want to stay behind
- Casual, grab and go lunch at the retreat house
- Quiet, creative exploration encouraged
- Digest the day over chef-prepared dinner at the retreat house
- Restful night of sleep
January 12, 2025
- Coffee, tea and warm pastries (g and gf) waiting for you
- Breakfast served at 8:30
- Gather at 9:30 to feel into intentions, and what you want to do
- Optional off-site museum outing for creative inspiration
- Nearby walking trails, nooks and spaces at the retreat house to sink into should you want to stay behind
- Casual, grab and go lunch at the retreat house
- Quiet, creative exploration encouraged
- Digest the day over chef-prepared dinner at the retreat house
- Restful night of sleep
January 13, 2025
- Coffee, tea and warm pastries (g and gf) waiting for you
- Breakfast served at 8:30
- Gather at 9:30 for reflections and closing ceremony
- Optional silent walk on the trails near the retreat house
- Quiet, creative exploration encouraged
- Leave at 12:00 for an afternoon of art and reflection in Santa Fe
- Return to Albuquerque at 6:00
- Flights, trains departures at/after 7:30
I would love for you to be a part of this special retreat. While I've hosted hundreds of events, retreats and experiences over the years, this is a sacred first in many ways.
If you want to come, let's have a conversation. It's important that it feels really good to you. Schedule time with me here. Registration closes Friday, October 31 or when the remaining spots fill.
We'll talk about the details, we'll ask each other questions, and if it feels like a resounding YES to you, I'll send you the link to secure your spot.
Key details:
- Arrive January 10
- Depart January 13
- Fly into Albuquerque, New Mexico
- Overnight includes everything but travel: $3,500
- Day includes everything but travel, accommodations and breakfast: $1,500
- Payment plans available for both guest types.
This is a retreat for coming out of the creative shadows. It's a luxurious, distraction-free place for rest, creativity, contemplation, connection.
p.s. Baldwin's talk.
p.p.s. D'Angelo has been on repeat for 2 weeks. And tears have been flowing since he passed away this week. He was with me in my teens, in LA, in Hawaii, in NYC, on the road, and in this house. 💔 As Matt put it, D'Angelo is unskippable — truly one of the greats.